The countdown is on. The San Diego 100 is nine days away and I'm feeling good, but the taper feels weird this time. I'm not that nervous. Usually around this time, I am second-guessing the whole running thing, ready to call it all quits, but this time is different. The shoulder injury might have something to do with it. When I separated my shoulder a few weeks ago, I didn't think I was going to be able to run the SD100, I really didn't. I told everyone that I would make it, and Lucho told me, above all else, to try to stay positive, but at the time, I didn't think it would be possible to toe the starting line. Luckily, I healed fast and my training wasn't too affected. And who knows, a finish still may not be in the cards for me, but right now I am feeling confident, excited for the race, and most importantly, my race beard is strong.
The days leading up to a big race are a mixture of so many emotions, and it's almost all positive. I wish I could bottle this feeling, this anticipation, then I could sell it to people who wouldn't get much done, except for sitting at their computers studying elevation profiles, reading race reports, and trying to come up with pace charts. The anticipation is fun, though, and I can't wait to be out there on the trails, in the heat of the day, and the stillness of the night, taking in a sunset and a sunrise that I'm sure will be memorable.
I haven't run 100 miles before and I'm looking forward to the opportunity to do it. It's a strange undertaking, and I don't see it as a huge deal. I'm sure it will test me, and I may or may not finish, but it's something I choose to do; it's just a crazy, self-centered stunt to go do some jogging, hiking, crawling, and possibly some running in the mountains. If anything, the training has taught me about focus and determination, so when I am confronted with real challenges, the kind that I don't have the luxury of choosing, I hope to be better at coping and overcoming.
I haven't gone over the logistics of what I will have in my drop bags and what exactly I will carry, but the one thing I know I will be carrying is this picture of my sister hiking three months after a double lung and heart transplant to remind me how to persevere, to overcome, and to (hopefully) finish.
Thanks for reading.
Thanks for reading.